i look back at myself and realize i wasn’t the person i was yesterday. my values have changed and maybe i’ve turned the complications into simplicity. nothing matters except beauty. 
if i want to be honest and i wanted you to really know me, i’d tell you listen to the ramblings of robert smith.. 
listening to a letter to elise is like falling in love over and over again.
inspiration like no other, faded frosted green, damp, cold..
like late night drives along empty sideroads, little light on the road, but my hand in your hand and i feel beautiful. or a shine of moonlight on the autumn air, a change of scenery but no feeling change.
tingling sensations through my body, and an overall feeling of happiness- i am content. 
i can see my breath in the air and my fingertips are slowly freezing to the point where everything i touch is numb. harsh, but smooth and simple. complaining about weather conditions and how the appearance of the sky is in sync with my mood, that’s real. 
you could never know me though. i haven’t lived enough to know me. 
for now, i’m simply a letter to elise played on repeat until life feels fiery warm, like magic. 

tagged as: the cure. a letter to elise. teenager. confusion. poetry. writing. beauty.